why go on?

tell me my friends
what reason you can give
for someone like me, in so much pain
to want to go on, to live?
go ahead, i really let
you can give it a try,
but i can almost guarantee
you won't even get me to cry.
you're right, i know,
if i die, he wins
and why should i die
because of his sins
but winning or losing,
why would i care?
if i live, the pain
is still there!
so if it's alright with you,
you'll have to find another
a different type of reason,
that doesn't include my "brother"
i know that you predict for me
a future hopeful and bright
but i'm living in the here and now,
with pain all day and night.
well don't you worry my dear friends,
i won't try suicide,
cause one thing that i do have left,
though battered, is my pride!