my life, poetry, and art
~record beaten! (as of right now!!!!!!)~went out today~ate two meals, and too much snack~i should shower but....
Wow, glad to see you're feeling so ambitious! Good luck! You can do it! And remember that even if you don't get to do all of it this time, progress is still a good thing!
Kudos to you for beating yiur record. "One day at a time"?? Pphhfftttt! Sometimes we just gotta take it one HOUR at a time, right? You're doing great!
Keep it up LS! You can do it!
last night:in bed on time. i think.today:~still didn't mess up (yet)~went out. and then went out again.~two mealsthanks for the encouragement everyone.
~showered~good night all
Amazing! I wish I had so much to say for my week... I'd better start writing some goals...
Keep it up - keep going - this record is the best ever. I wish I could say the same for my goals set. Be proud of yourself.
~still didn't mess up~went to friend's house, and later went out again with mother~2 meals
~anyone who looks at my counter knows i messed up. twice.~stayed home all day. in pajamas. was kind enough to put on my bathrobe and help. for like, 15 minutes. wow, i'm so good!~if chocolate, candy, and pretzels is eating, i ate.~shower? what's that?~oh my, look at the time. whaddaya know? i'm still up. shocker.
You always talk about wanting to hurt yourself, but never about wanting to hurt your brother. Are you blaming yourself for what happened?How about this for an idea, though I'm sure your shrink, parents, etc, will say that it's a bad idea, then again they didn't go through what you did and they're not going through what you are going through.Go to a shooting range in PA or in Manhattan, imagine that the target is your brother and empty a couple of clips into his face.Or, get a free standing heavy bag, you can get online, or a makiwara board, also online or pick it up from Kinjisan on Nostrand and I think L, paste his picture on the bag/board and just go at it whenever you feel like hurting yourself.And for added bonus, make sure your family knows what you're doing. Wouldn't it feel great if at the next family get together your brother would fear you.
c'mon, i know you're reading this! what do you think?