Thursday, December 11, 2008
another stupid study update...
ok. they are really brilliant. so, my psychiatrist is just as annoyed at them as i was, cuz they were really dragging things out, right? she called them. she has an in, cuz she also works for the NYSPI, just on a study that doesn't make potential participants crazy the way this one does. anyway, i just got this piece of info from her:
this whole thing is to see if i am accepted into the stupid study. but i get the treatment for free, whether or not i'm accepted, as a token of their appreciation of my participation in their retraumitizing me.
it would have been nice if they told me that when they started evaluating me. it would have been a lot simpler, and caused me a lot less pain. now i just gotta figure out-if they don't accept me for the study, do i get to keep my therapist that i like, even though they're treating me? can i keep going to her, to get over the trauma of the evaluation?