Sunday, December 7, 2008

prison cell


shabbos.
the day you wait for all week.
shabbos.
the day of rest, calm, and peace.

my weekly descent
into a dark, dank prison cell
with no one to talk to
when things don't go well.
no phone calls.
no texting.
no emails, no IM,
only "resting"

this is resting?
this is peace?
more like "go ahead,
hurt yourself please!"

no system of support
to help me deal with the pain,
or at least no system
halachically permissable anyway.

and so, i hurt, sleep and wake
get up and put on a smile so fake
eat a lovely shabbos meal
then back to bed with the pain i feel.

shabbos.
the day i dread all week.
shabbos.
relief from its pain i seek.

2 comments:

  1. Yeah. I often don't enjoy Shabbos either. It's one of the problems with the way we live today -- On one hand, technology enables us to be connected so much better to so many more people. On the other hand, that means that on Shabbos we're cut off from all that.

    I guess that's kind of the point of Shabbos, too -- cut off from everything else, we have nothing to distract ourselves with, no choice but to spend time with HaShem... cry to Him.

    ReplyDelete
  2. that's all good and fine if you can figure out how to cry spend time with Him, and how to cry to Him. but some of us...can't.

    ReplyDelete

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