hold my hand and understand

i need someone to understand me,
but not many people can.
i need someone to be here with me,
in my pain. just be here with me.
i don't really want them to understand.
the only way to understand is
to go through all
the pain
the suffering
the torture
the shame
the silence.
i don't want anyone to go through all of that.
but please,
somebody,
hold my hand,
hug me,
and understand
that you don't understand.
please, somebody...
somebody...
hug me and
hold my hand,
squeeze it gently
tell me
that it'll be alright
but please
understand
while holding
my hand
that my pain
needs to be worked through
in my own way
that the path i'm taking contains
a little from one way
a drop from another,
some support from one person...
understand
as you hold my hand
if you are
that someone who will,
that i can't really
be so different
from the way that i am
but i do need someone
to hug me, hold me
understand, and squeeze my hand